February 2012
1 post
January 2012
1 post
October 2011
1 post
3 tags
September 2011
5 posts
2 tags
ADD
My ADD is totally keeping me from… uhhhh… I’m hungry.
2 tags
3 tags
4 tags
Independent arm
The “independent” arm of the Food Network is called “Food Network Organics”. They release smaller run dishes and underground recipes.
1 tag
jameshance:
Wizards refer to Disney’s Magic Kingdom as ‘Disney’s Regular Kingdom’.
July 2011
1 post
3 tags
June 2011
2 posts
3 tags
3 tags
Ensly Mogul Tumblr →
I would love if you followed this Tumblr and shared with friends. It’s all space and ufo and electro space tunes.
May 2011
1 post
1 tag
Q+A vol.8
Q: Where do you go when you run out of chess pieces?
A: The Pawn Shop.
April 2011
3 posts
1 tag
February 2011
1 post
Q+A vol.7
Q: What’s the quickest way to spice up your meal?
A: Pepper Spray.
January 2011
2 posts
Oneliner #9
My cheese grater gave my limburger a C.
Q+A vol.6
Q: Who invented the food dish “Baba Ganoush”.
A: Robert (Bobby) Ganoush.
December 2010
2 posts
Feral Celebs.
Was Will Ferrell actually raised by wolves in the wild? Or am I thinking of Pharrell Williams?
KING OF BEES
risingtensions:
via brx0
November 2010
5 posts
Soda Jokes
- I’m a Mountain Do, not a Mountain Don’t.
- It Sprite out here, even with all the Sierra Mist.
- Nurse Salt, Resident Cumin, E M Turmeric (varieties of Dr. Pepper)
- I don’t want any ick water, much less a ton of it.
- The tide is High Fructose Corn Syrup on the Pep Sea today.
After this post I hope to be an official member of Club Soda.
Philosophy Thought #1
I think it’s called surfing because once you start you become a “slave” to the wave.
Q+A vol.5
Q. If you owned a van, what kind of van would it be?
A. A Halen, no wait, I think I would prefer a Morrison.
Daily Meme (vol. 1 (may be the only volume?!)) →
Don’t forget to check out today’s meme. It’s all about this Maury Tumblr.
Barn
Barn is a great word. If it were a name it would be short for Barnyard.
for example: “Hi Barn” said Barry as Barnyard Jones Jr. waked by.
October 2010
2 posts
Q+A vol.4
Q. What do you drink if you can’t afford Goldschlager?
A. Copperschlager.
Q+A vol.3
Q. What’s your favorite TV show about Ravers?
A. “That’s So Raven”
August 2010
4 posts
Q+A vol.2
Q. What’s your favorite movie about food?
A. Raisin Arizona.
Q+A vol.1
Q. What’s the opposite of a Sloppy Joe?
A. A Tidy Ryan.
Oops.
I put up some info in the classifieds. Bad move. Now everyone can see it. They should call it the de-classifieds.
It’s just so true.
June 2010
2 posts
I think we can all learn a little bit about comedy from this guy. So “off the wall” and “ahead” of his time. Thanks Starsearch, and Found Footage Fest.
Oneliner #9
Apple just came out with a new recipe, the iPad Thai.
May 2010
5 posts
V-Neck!
We all love our V-neck shirts, but I want a Q-neck or W-neck shirt. When will AmAppy start selling those? H-neck would be great too.
Handy
I usually prefer to do things by hand. But sometimes I do them by mind, or foot.
Mr. Bubble
I can’t believe the creators of Mr. Bubble still haven’t created a bubble bath that ladies can use. Ms. (or Mrs.) Bubble can’t be that hard to invent. Sexist jerks.
My Top 8: Niche Restaurant Names
Chai and Chives
Nana’s Bananas
Powders Only!
Invisi-foods
Kevin Spacie’s Moon Pies and Astronaut Creams.
Pancake Island (an actual island made of a pancake, fun for kids)
Atomic Atom’s Apples
The Fixslow Breakfast Cafe
Bathroom.
Just went to the restroom while reading a math book. Took a crapazoid.
April 2010
6 posts
Prestigious
Someday I will be a wealthy detective and live in the prestigious gated community known as “The Sherlock Homes”.
Free consulting for linkedin.com
What you guys need is a new mascot. And I got it here just for you. Abraham Linkedin.
Oneliner #8
Earth Day is cool, but I prefer Mars Day.
Produce
Someone’s grandmother should open up a banana stand and call it Nana’s Bananas.
The Best Invention.
And then it came to me as I starred at the uneven walls of my turn-of-the-century abode. The invention that will put me on the map will not be a simple “fad” or “fool notion”. No, this invention will change the world. As a fellow inventor once told me, “Of all of Invention’s most natural necessities, the most important is time”, and that’s when it...
March 2010
3 posts
Oneliner #7
Back to the store for me. I forgot the Cheez Whip and Cool Whizz.
February 2010
5 posts